You're completely useless in the revolution.
My liver just broke up with me...
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Randomize