I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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