yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
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