bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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