Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
