i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Randomize
