she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
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