Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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