he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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