He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Randomize
