are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
