his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Randomize
