guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize