Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Randomize
