Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
