i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
You may now shotgun with the bride
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Randomize
