I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
