Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
