And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize