I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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