susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
