doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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