you guys were way drunker than both of me
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Randomize
