just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
