dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I think I am morally bankrupt
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
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I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
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This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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