Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize