Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
