Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
