wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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