We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
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