He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
