your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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