do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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