Plan B is the new Plan A
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
