There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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