a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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