Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
