rhymes with "ouble enetration"
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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