I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
