love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
this will be a night to untag.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
