We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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