he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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