If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize