Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.