we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
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