i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
