i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
