You really coming over, don't trick.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
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Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
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Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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