It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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