Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
