It's like a parade of train wrecks.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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