What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
